Last friday a family of six was brutally bludgeoned to death with baseball bats while they slept. The cause, investigators say, was an Xbox. You see, Xboxes make people kill people - like guns, and videogames. Every console has a special chip built in that transmits telepathic mind control signals into deepest parts of a gamer's subconscious... telling them to do terrible things - like cold blooded murder.
Apparently some cloths were responsible too.
The liberal media would like to add: When will the madness end? We must save our children! And in order to do so we must immediately and without hesitation ban all videogames... and cloths. Then, and only then will the killing stop!
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